Newbie 2016-10-09T20:20:06+00:00

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  • SarahSarahC
    Post count: 4

    Hi my name is Sarah. I have been separated 8 months. It was very traumatic at the time as there were mental health/addiction issues involved. After trying for a good couple of years to hold the relationship together, I found it takes two, and I could no longer subject myself to the circus of behaviour my children and I were being exposed to, as much as I loved my husband.

    My friends have been very supportive. Through this process though I have become estranged from some members of my family including my parents.

    The initial sharp end of the hurt is over, life goes on accompanied by a deep grief lurking just beneath the surface.

    DannyDanny de Hek
    Post count: 171

    Hello Sarah

    Welcome to the forum

    My sister had mental health/addiction issues and it is not nice! You can now start planing your own life. Since you have broken up has he got help or did it make him change his selfish life style?

    KarenKaren Degen
    Post count: 8

    Hi Sarah. Its important for you to deal with the grief. You can either seek help, or if you want to do it yourself ensure you FEEL the grief. Only through feeling your emotions will you process them and come out the other side. If you push them down they won’t resolve themselves and your grief period will be much, much longer. Put your mental and emotional energy into healing you.

    Post count: 4

    Geez it was a rough time when I posted the above. Feeling a bit better now. Now that I’m on my own, when things go wrong I feel quite exposed. Like lately my two good friends nearby are both up to their eyeballs in study and I’d been finding myself somewhat lonely, my workload was getting lighter, and I’m still getting over the estrangement from my parents (who I thought would support me after my separation).

    Anyway, things are getting better socially, workload is better too. I’ve been buying an investment property, which even though is positive stress, it seemed to upset my balance a bit.

    I might use the long weekend to deal with my grief a bit more. Maybe write some letters and do some soul searching, knowing I don’t have to go all red eyed to work the next day! I think it will also be helpful for me to concentrate on my gratitude – I’ve still got my children, my house, I haven’t copped a huge debt, and I haven’t been cheated on.

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